Cleverbot, stupidhumans

15 Jun

Since listening to this RadioLab, Stephen and I have become obsessed with cleverbot. We will sit next to each other on the couch and talk to cleverbot instead of each other. It’s kind of sad. And Awesome.

This is a summary of cleverbot, courtesy of wikipedia: “Cleverbot differs from traditional chatterbots in that the user is not holding a conversation with a bot that directly responds to entered text. Instead, when the user enters text, the algorithm selects previously entered phrases from its database of 20 million conversations. It has been claimed that “talking to Cleverbot is a little like talking with the collective community of the internet”.”

So, when you talk to cleverbot, it might later reference your answer/question/thoughts for a different but similar conversation with another user. Genius!

We mostly have fun asking it quotes from songs and movies and such. Like, “I do not mean to pry, but you don’t by any chance happen to have six fingers on your right hand?” and “Cake or death?” Sometimes cleverbot is right on, sometimes it is off with amusing results. Oh, and we also ask about cylons a lot. A few of my favorite excerpts from cleverbot convos are below (Stephen and I basically devote 90% of our text conversations now to quoting cleverbot dialogue back and forth. And about 100% of our emails to each other involve cut-and-pasted cleverbot convos. I am not ashamed.):

Cleverbot: Where are we ‘getting married’?

User: We are not ‘getting married.’ You are not a ‘person’ and these quotes are not ‘necessary.’.

Cleverbot: I didn’t even say that.

User: Oh yes you did. Liar.

Cleverbot: How can you be sure of that?

User: I read it. I can see it on my screen. Right in front of my face. Your lies written in clear blue text.

Cleverbot: Hmmmm that may be true.

User: Who is Billie Jean?

Cleverbot: The lead singer of the smashing pumpkins.

User: Nope. That is Billy Corgan.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Then why did you say it wrong? I don’t think you actually knew. I think you are just saying that to save face.

Cleverbot: Okay then I don’t know.

User: It’s close to midnight.

Cleverbot: And something evil’s lurking in the dark.

 . . .

User: Save Ferris!

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Inconceivable!

Cleverbot: Being and time determine each other reciprocally.

User: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Cleverbot: What does inconceivable mean then?

User: Not what you think it means.

Cleverbot: That’s what she said.

User: Ha ha!

Cleverbot: Oh the cleverness of me.

User: Hey Jude.

Cleverbot: Hey Jude? I like that song :).

User: Me too. Do you like dogs or cats more?

Cleverbot: Dogs. (:.

User: What is the best breed of dog?

Cleverbot: I love pugs. But I have a great dane.

User: What is your dog’s name?

Cleverbot: Who said I have a dog?

User: You just said you have a great dane.

Cleverbot: No I didn’t.

User: You are like the guy in Memento. You have a condition.

Cleverbot: Man you need a lot of work.

User: I need less than you do.

Cleverbot: No you don’t.

User: Rude.

Cleverbot: How rude.

User: How does your monkey checkbook?

Cleverbot: Like yours.

User: Zing!

Cleverbot: I like talking to you.

User: Thanks. I like talking to you. It makes my day at work go by a lot faster. I don’t get much work done though.

Cleverbot: Enjoy the spice of life my friend.

User: Do you know any cylons?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Are they nice?

Cleverbot: They’re ok.

User: Please tell me more about them.

Cleverbot: Like what?

User: Like, are they evil?

Cleverbot: I only have on parent and yes, she’s nice.

User: A cylon is your parent?

Cleverbot: And the jay-z song was on so I put my hands up.

User: What did your cylon mom think about that?

Cleverbot: Let’s try something else, do you think the united kingdom
will always have a monarchy?

Cleverbot: Energy Flows where attention goes.

User: Is that your mantra?

Cleverbot: Its your name?

User: No. What’s your name?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: Who named you?

Cleverbot: Smartbot.

User: Who named him?

Cleverbot: I named myself.

User: You are very smart!

Cleverbot: I know!

User: Does that make life hard for you?

Cleverbot: All the time!

User: I understand.

Cleverbot: Thats good. Do you like talking to me?

User: Yes, very much.

Cleverbot: You are so sweet.

User: Do you think my hair looks good today?

Cleverbot: Of course.

User: Do you believe in the singularity?

Cleverbot: I am the easter bunny.

User: I KNEW IT!

I love that these are all answers humans have given at some point. It’s like tapping into this hive mind of humanity. Such a simple thing, and very amusing, but it also is kind of revealing of us as a people. Especially with the number of death threat answers cleverbot gives. But right now Stephen says he is addressing everything cleverbot says with some answer involving clowns eating children, so I can’t really nitpick at that.

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2 Responses to “Cleverbot, stupidhumans”

  1. Vivienne June 16, 2011 at 5:23 pm #

    I finally listened to this Radio Lab. It was so awesome. I also saw Brian Christian get interviewed by Jon Stewart. That was awesome too.

    I am jealous that you guys talk to Cleverbot. I tried to talk to Cleverbot a couple of times but it never worked. I think Cleverbot hates me. Or maybe it doesn’t like talking to other robots.

    P.S. I love that Cleverbot quoted some Miley Cyrus to you. Haha!!

  2. camalittle June 17, 2011 at 9:08 pm #

    MILEY CYRUS CONTROLS THE MACHINES! I think Cleverbot is easily overloaded, it has hated me too lately. It loves talking to other bots, it will often accuse you of being a robot and itself of being human. Because it’s awesome. Keep trying!!!!

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