Alien abduction is the only logical explanation

1 Feb

I couldn’t sleep last night for like, three hours. Which I take as a personal defeat. I am usually really, really good at sleeping. Champion sleeper. I have slept through fire alarms, and on almost every mode of transportation (except covered wagon. But that’s on the bucket list). I don’t understand insomniacs: just close your eyes, stop thinking, and sleep! Easy! Not last night though.

I woke up about 3:30 am, thinking I heard Stephen talking to his dog, Julius, in the living room. Which wouldn’t be weird, because Julius is trying to train us to allow him to sleep on the bed, and we are trying to train him to stay on the couch (it’s a compromise). So, when Julius comes and cries by the foot of the bed every hour at night, it’s our routine to move him back to the couch, tuck him in (yes, he demands a blanket. He literally will stand on the couch whining until you cover him with a blanket. It’s charming when it’s not the middle of the night), give him a pet and some praise, then go back to bed. Sometimes with Julius jumping off the couch and following two steps behind, looking like a Doberman-jedi with his blanket on top of him. Anyway, the point is, I thought I heard Stephen talking in the other room, but then when I rolled over, he was there in bed with me.

sexxy Julius under his manly blanket

If I had thought I heard voices while I was alone, that would’ve been scary. But since there was a dude and a dog in the apartment with me, I figured any dog-whispering intruder would be taken care of by them, and I didn’t have to worry. Though I did proceed to stay awake for the next three hours. Which is why I heard Stephen when he rolled over 10 minutes later and said to me, “3:45.” ME: “what?” STEPHEN: “3:45.” ME: “Ok. What’s that [thinking he’s sleeptalking]?” STEPHEN:” You asked me what time it was. It’s 3:45″. . . . um, FREAKY! I had definitely not asked him what time it was, but he insists I did, even this morning. This on the tail of me thinking he was talking in the other room, when he was actually snoring next to me. There was clearly a glitch in the matrix, and/or we were abducted by aliens last night. Either way, it was a long night.

But BEFORE that long night, I made an awesome dinner. Vegan mac and cheese! It was delish. It’s the first time I’ve tried such a feat, mostly because I get exhausted by looking at the recipe lists and all the stuff I have to buy that I know I won’t be able to easily find in Boise. But this one was surprisingly easy-cheesy (ha!) and soo so good! It didn’t taste at all like mac and cheese, so if I served it to non-vegans I would call it pasta nut sauce, or something. But that’s ok. In one of my many fantasy parties-I-will-have-when-I-can-fit-more-than-two-people-in-my-apartment is a vegan mac and cheese party, to taste-test and give official approval to the many, many recipes out there. But till then, this one will be my go-to. Bonus points for being quick/easy to make. And pretty (despite the picture below, which looks kind of barfy, because I was impatient and just wanted to eat it. The original recipe page has pretty pictures). I just bought this blogger’s cookbook ( based on this one recipe.

mac and nutty creamy broccoli sauce!

Somewhat related, I am so ready to move out of this apartment. I’ve pretty much given up trying to keep it clean, since I’ll only be here four more months or so. I was storing my mom’s bike on my little back patio, hence blocking my access to a useful storage closet out there, and was bugging her to come get her gol’dang bike so I could put my Christmas decorations back in storage, but then I realized . . . eff it. And I just made a big pile of Christmas decorations under the stairs. Thanks to a Costco run, I also have a lifetime’s worth of toilet paper that I have nowhere to store. You currently have to step over it to get to the actual toilet. But I will totally be prepared to TP any house, anywhere, anytime, for the rest of my life. Worth it.


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